Today was the first day I haven’t visited Ryan. I chose to spend the afternoon with the girls.
We went outside and Natalie dutifully got out my outdoor chair (the one I used toward the end of my pregnancy to watch them play). I sat there thinking how peaceful the day was. Ainsley got into her cozy coupe and said, “I not leaving. I just moving my car.” She rolled down the driveway, got out of her car, came and stood in front of me and said, “I back!”
Later, Natalie sat down beside me in her chair and said, “We’re watching our kids play, right?” Right, dear! This is what life was like every day before Ryan was born.
Even though we are at the hospital a lot, it is still hard for us to incorporate Ryan into our family. I’m getting used to telling people I have three kids and the girls have a hard time remembering they have a brother. Natalie drew a picture of our family the other day… a daddy with very long legs, a little mommy with long hair, and two little girls. When we asked her who else was in her family, she looked puzzled and couldn’t come up with the answer. We reminded her about Ryan and she said, “Oh yeah.” and then drew a little baby. It broke my heart.
(c) 2016 Leighann Marquiss
Comments (9)
Keep faith!!! It must’ve been bittersweet sitting with your girls! But remember to take care of yourself so that you can take care of everyone too!
Dear Wonderful Niece and Nephew,
Thank you so much for blogging. It really helps us to know how all are doing.
Be encouraged that the One who has the great Plans for our lives, also provides the grace and strength for us to accomplish those Plans.
Much love, Aunt Amelia
oh. i’m sure that was SO good for your girls. and for your “mom heart”. you are doing such a great job through all this…
I’m glad you were able to spend time with the girls. It was really hard for me when Trent didn’t know he had a sister yet. It’s a really hard thing for them anyway, but when the baby isn’t home yet then they just don’t get it. Show them lots of pictures. We made Trent a photo album of Maggie’s pictures that he could take with him to wherever he was staying when we were at the hospital. Hang in there! You’re doing a great job. Sending lots of prayers,
Faith
Very sweet that you spent the day with the girls! I’m sure they loved it! I too hope that you are taking care of yourself! As moms we sometimes get so into “taking care” of our kids and everyone else, that we do forget ourselves. You are doing such an incredible job, Leighann!! I think about you everyday and pray for your strength!
Love you!
Richelle
That’s great that you got some time with the girls, they sound absolutely precious. 🙂 I know that we’ve never met, but just wanted to reassure you that there are so many out there that care and are lifting you and your family in prayer. Hang in there
– you’re in the Father’s hands. 🙂
Jami Hespe
Keep praying, he will be part of your family some day soon and then you will be watching all of them play together and your heart will be so overcome you won’t be able to hold back the tears of joy. It’s good you got to enjoy an afternoon with your girls.
Just popping back in to check on Ryan and let you know prayers are still pouring out for your little guy and your whole family!
I am so thankful you had some time to sit and watch your girls… it must have been wonderful for them to be with you as well. It must be so hard for you to make thse choices and then try to fit in time to care for your own needs. I am praying God truly does give you the strength of Super Woman! I know you need it everyday. The kind of strength that when the day is done you look back and say, “How did I do that” and you know it was your Lord!