Staying at home with young children is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Not physically mind you, but mentally. There is no way to explain it unless you have ever tried to do it. When I worked outside the home, I could leave my work at work, if not during the week, for sure on the weekends. If I needed a mental break, I could take a walk at lunch, or hide in the bathroom, or take a personal day. Vacation was just that… a vacation.
With small children, there is no such thing as a mental break, clocking out, sick days, or vacation. Your wonderful small children are always there. A L W A Y S. Did I mention always?
One of the things that helps me keep my sanity is trading off babysitting with another stay-at-home mom. When Natalie was three-months-old, a friend and I started trading babysitting. One week I would watch her infant for a few hours (or five) and the next she would watch Natalie. It was a life-saver!
After Ainsley was born I noticed something else. My friend and I continued trading babysitting (she had added another baby as well), but I typically used those precious alone hours to run errands. I noticed I was more and more agitated. I realized without meaning to be I was very isolated. Getting anywhere with two children was more hassle than it was worth so I ended up staying home A LOT! To combat my isolation I joined a book club and resolved to have friends over more often. I subscribed to a national magazine so I felt in the loop on current events.
These few things alone went a long way toward helping me cope with two babies under the age of three. If you are feeling overwhelmed and isolated, I encourage you to look for ways to get out of the house… the things I did were almost all free. And those that weren’t were worth every penny.
For the mamas out there, how do you cope with small kids at home?
Comments (8)
Good question…how to cope with little ones at home. I have 3 under the age of 5 and I work full-time from home. Some days are just too crazy to describe, but most days are really great. I wish I could say that we get out and do a lot, but we really don’t. I try to find fun and creative ways to spend the day…which usually leads to a big mess, but it is so worth it. I look forward to my husband coming home every night and I am pretty sure the kids do too.
What a great post, Leighann. It totally resonated with me. I work from home which only adds to the isolation, but getting together with friends in the evening or on weekends, or meeting up with a girlfriend for a yoga class is how I like to recharge. I need to do more of that, though. Like you, most of the time when I find myself with alone time, I end up doing things alone, like running errands or going for a run – which is good, but doesn’t help those feelings of loneliness. Your post is motivating me to make more of an effort! 🙂
This is so, so true! It’s really easy to feel isolated and alone, and I struggled with that some after my daughter was born because I was SO independent before. I have found that getting out of the house, even for a short walk is really helpful for my state of mind. Around here, the libraries have great sing along programs for 1-2 year olds, so that’s one thing we do to get out of the house and be social.
I’m blessed to have a great network of moms through our local chapter MOMS Club. I work 3 days a week outside of the home and love every moment with my children on my day off, but we seem to have much better days if we are able to see and play with other moms and kiddos. Yesterday for example we took a walk and then to the park for play group.
All right, are you listening to the conversations I am having in my head?? First the marshmallows , now this it’s getting a little strange. 😉
I have been thinking about leaving the house, but I don’t see me going anywhere. Taking 4 kids out under 7 just will not be enjoyable for anyone , unless its’ to MCD’s(YUCK) and then right back home for a nap! HAHA! Having one with food allergies possibly two it is hard to be involved in any programs where snack is involved or lurking Peanuts among others. We actually had to quit a program because the staff said they could not stop others from bringing in things she is allergic to. 🙁 Most people are scared to watch my children because of it. It does wear on me. I know it’s just the season I am in right now. Saying all that I have enjoyed the online blogs and “friends” I have made. As soon as baby is old enough at least I will be back to church. Someday when everyone is older I am sure I will get out..A Lot!! 🙂 Kelly
I arrange a babysitter for my 2 toddlers sometimes and go out with a friend to shop at consignment stores. I sometimes decide to go for a drive near naptime thus causing the 2 toddlers to fall asleep. I then go thru a drive thru and get a snack. Sleeping kids, snacks and your favorite cd or talk radio show can be a nice time out. The latter does not cure the isolation but does help with some of the insanity.
I have a seven year old in school but I have two toddlers, 11 months apart! They just turned 2 and 13 months. Johana, I do the same thing!!!! Somedays you just need to get out of the house, even for a few min. This summer I made a big deal out of it with my seven year old, as our secret outing (of course Daddy knows!). We would drive till the babies went to sleep, hit Burger King for a slushee and coffee and then look at books while the babies slept.
What a trip down memory lane for me… my babies are nearly grown.
My thoughts on this topic are too long for just a comment, so I it’s on my blog.
http://relishingdesserts.blogspot.com/2010/08/memories-of-being-sahm.html
You’ve created a wonderful blog that’s such a pleasure to read.
~Jessica